Lessons from my old ladies

I don't have the most interesting job. Most of the time I'm something of a housekeeper, personal assistant, friend and memory helper to elderly folks in their homes. I'm officially titled a "Personal Care Worker," or "unlicensed caregiver" on my resume.

But I work with a population that not everyone has contact with on a regular basis, and I take from it what I can. My curiosity always leads me to asking questions whenever the mood is right. Maybe it's the reporter in me, but I've asked the same question over the past few months to certain women who seem happy and fulfilled at this stage of their game. I want to know their secret, so I asked:

What would you say has been the very best part of your life?

I don't know why I am so fascinated with that question. Maybe I am trying to foreshadow my own life. To be on the lookout for the one thing that I should really, really relish. I thought for sure they'd all say "kids." Those little darlings. But to my surprise, the responses are similar: "Marrying my husband." For many of them, lucky souls, their husbands were the absolute highlights of their lives.

Of course, this only makes me more curious. Did I just happen to ask women who had been really lucky in love? Maybe. If so, is love really what it's all about? I should ask my grandma, who was divorced at a young age. Bet she'd have a different answer.

I'm also reminded that my ladies are from a very different generation.
One waited 3 years for her husband, while he was away in WWII, then held as a POW by the Japanese. Another is married to an intolerant asshole. Even the kids have disowned him--but she stays loyal.

So how is this related to my own life? I don't know yet. Choose carefully, I guess?

Comments

Anonymous said…
How interesting. You ask a great question to those who have been here longer than us. I have asked a slightly different question to seniors. After asking of their life stories I ask "What is something that you would have done differently." Almost everyone I have asked has said, "I would work less, travel more and spend more time with my family."

I am going to ask your question and see what sentiments are revealed. It really does make you wonder what we will be saying at that age doesn't it?
6:11 PM
Cassady said…
I like your question even better, Murph! That life experience is priceless. Has anyone said, "I would have paid off my credit card more quickly?"
8:16 AM
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