So Very Evil

I am going to get bad karma for this one. Then again, it's all in the name of healthy capitalism!?

I posted a fake help wanted ad today on a certain national community bulletin board website. I am sick and tired of writing super-great cover letters and sending my resume along with clips to address after address, and hearing no response. I want to see who I am up against. I know it's mean. There is probably some nice, peaceful soul sitting out there right now writing her very special cover letter to my fake address, hoping to be considered for the part of "writer" on my new website. HA!

Maybe my plan is to wear everyone out.... I will keep posting these fake jobs, all over the world... and pretty soon no one will have the energy to respond when the reeeeeeal jobs come in. Then, and only then, the perfect job will be mine.

I know, I am a creep. But other than this, what have I done wrong so far? Maybe my writing is terrible. I know it's not perfect, but come on, I see much worse writing than mine published every day! Maybe I have big visible boogers. Maybe I smell. Maybe I spell tomorrow and recommend wrong every single time I write it. But is that all that matters in this world? I was going through my gmail account, looking at all these gorgeous beautiful letters I have sent out to businesses who would be lucky to have me. What gives? I would hire me! Even my babysitting job hasn't called me back yet, and the grocery store? I called my new boss today, and he said he'd call back tomorrow. I am beginning to think I need some sort of exorcism or curse lifted. Seriously.

So, if I don't get struck by lightning within the next 24 hours, I should have some pretty good material for my research, i.e., other people's resume's and cover letters.

MMwwwahahahaaaaa.

Comments

Cassady said…
I will rot in HELL!!
5:16 PM
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