Bloggy

Well I won't say things are looking up, but it's only Tuesday. I am only 2 days into my evaluation* and I feel pretty good. Right now many friends and potential friends (including the nice guy from Portland I sold my ticket to) are setting up for the week on the Playa at Black Rock City. They are unrolling their dusty tents, pounding in 10-inch tent stakes in 40-mile an hour winds. They are covered in playa powder, wearing tutus and sharing food with strangers. They are planning what mind altering drugs they will be taking and what trancendental workshops they'll be attending all while hypnotized by pounding trance music from 20 ft. tall speakers. I am typing away on my computer, cat on lap, from overcast Portland. I'm not bummed. It's my life and I get to play it how I want. Burning Man comes every year, and right now there are more important things to plan. I am seriously considering going back to school. I have a job interview (for a job actually in my field) tod...

Well, shit. Since I have the next 10 days off, I decided that instead of begging for shifts at my bakery job, I'd sit down and reevaluate everything. It's only midday on Monday, and I'm already headed down an entirely new path. Journalism is great. Heck ya, love it. But, I guess it was true what aaaallll those people (even my instructors) said. It wont make you rich. In fact, it will barely enable you to make a living, unless you struggle for years or have great talent and great luck. Especially here. Take Portland, for example. Hmph. I've been looking for work in this field for four months now, and have not even come close to anything. I haven't even had one offer. The "dream" job I'd been chasing recently said that no, the recruiter was wrong: They don't pay $35,000 a year, they pay somewhere between $20 and $25,000. Are you still interested? Yeah. Freelancing is awesome. For a second there I made about $50 an hour. But what about health insuranc...

was for a job I didn't even want. I went in thinking that I was overqualified. I talked about wanting to explore new industries and settle into a routine, that's why I was veering off my career path. Lies lies lies, and I think the interviewer could see it. She left me with the parting words, "I am looking for someone with more of the skills needed for this job." Then why'd she call me? Why did she waste my time? It's as if some great force thinks that I still haven't been humbled enough and is toying with me, seeing how far I can go before I snap. The rejection has left me feeling much like I got used to in dating: When that dorky guy you don't even like doesn't return a phone call. It's infuriating because you wanted to turn him down first. You know the relationship is all wrong, but you figured it out, and it's up to you to fix it. Then he doesn't give you the chance. Bummer.

What's Portland like? The call came in on a Tuesday morning. “We’ve gotten ahold of your resume, would you be interested in an administrative assistant position?” Would I? You mean, would I like to take a job taking phone calls and making travel arrangements for people who have real jobs? Sure. I’ll take it. What are my options anyway? My editor said she’d publish my article last week and it still hasn’t made it in. Haven’t been offered any new assignments in two weeks. My job at the bakery is a joke. Years of college, learning Spanish, taking on every responsibility I could leads to... this? Thoughts turn dark… failure. Suicide? OK—not quite so dark, but dark. Then, an email! A letter! A phone call! I see the light at the end of the tunnel! My article is in! At long last! But wait… it is published in, perhaps, the worst possible place a published article could be published: Inside, back page of the insert publication inside the newspaper. Not to mention it’s been chopped, rearran...